i really think you did a good job of hitting the audience with a negative tone on this one. im impressed that you could pull of the negativity of this piece while still upholding the brightness.
i think that there may be a little noise with some of the inconsistencies of the card. for instance, the very first lantern shown is in front of the very first girl--floating. now-- im not so sure that it is a problem considering it actually took me a while to see it. also, after the ladies, there is a man with some sort of other mechanical piece that he is working on. is this intentional? is there a reason that he, too, is not working on a lantern. is i another sign of the technical process of putting together lanterns--- as if they hold a machine-like quality?
i think that this communicates to the audience very well. the crop and depth of field are nice-- although, i wonder if it would be more, or less effective to really blow out the idea by having showing a picture of hundreds of people working on these lamps? i don't know. you did such a great job portraying this concept, im not so sure that it needs improvement.
thanks for the feedback, I think addressing some of these concerns could help make this image look a little more finished. I suppose the foremost lantern was meant to be hanging in another workspace; you just don't see the person working on it.
The mechanical piece is only a tool from the original image; i assume some kind of sewing machine or soldering device. I don't think it's necessary to remove this sort of thing, but I agree that seeing more of the lantern in the background—even if it's a mere white blur—will help to keep the focus on the it as the subject.
I agree with zooming out to show more of the story. I intend on building a more complete narrative in revisions.
2 comments:
wow bammo!
i really think you did a good job of hitting the audience with a negative tone on this one. im impressed that you could pull of the negativity of this piece while still upholding the brightness.
i think that there may be a little noise with some of the inconsistencies of the card. for instance, the very first lantern shown is in front of the very first girl--floating. now-- im not so sure that it is a problem considering it actually took me a while to see it. also, after the ladies, there is a man with some sort of other mechanical piece that he is working on. is this intentional? is there a reason that he, too, is not working on a lantern. is i another sign of the technical process of putting together lanterns--- as if they hold a machine-like quality?
i think that this communicates to the audience very well. the crop and depth of field are nice-- although, i wonder if it would be more, or less effective to really blow out the idea by having showing a picture of hundreds of people working on these lamps? i don't know. you did such a great job portraying this concept, im not so sure that it needs improvement.
yay for negativity!
thanks for the feedback, I think addressing some of these concerns could help make this image look a little more finished. I suppose the foremost lantern was meant to be hanging in another workspace; you just don't see the person working on it.
The mechanical piece is only a tool from the original image; i assume some kind of sewing machine or soldering device. I don't think it's necessary to remove this sort of thing, but I agree that seeing more of the lantern in the background—even if it's a mere white blur—will help to keep the focus on the it as the subject.
I agree with zooming out to show more of the story. I intend on building a more complete narrative in revisions.
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